“If we took time to explore the real root causes of all forms of stress, we would find that both lazy and distorted thinking lie behind the various emotions that we find stressful. In most developed cultures, no-one tells us that we are each responsible for our own thoughts and feelings. We miss learning the lesson of inner self-responsibility which reminds us that we create our own stress in life by the way we perceive and respond to others and the world.” – Mike George
We tend to blame other people for the way we feel. Someone ‘made’ you angry or sad. However, the truth is no-one can make you feel anything, except yourself. Most of us over-analyse and pay attention to everyone and everything around us all the time. Instead of projecting our stress onto others, we need to learn how to train our own emotions and our mind. But how do we do that?
- Self-knowledge (you can start with these questions)
- Therapy if necessary
- Acting from the heart
Any other ideas?
Happiness is a skill
Life is full of choices
Life is short and we shouldn’t waste it. The worst thing you can do is be a slave of your own rules. “I need to finish all books I start.”, “What will people think if I just stand up and go?”, “I can’t leave my house without putting make-up on.”, “If I’m different, everyone will stare at me.” Even the rules we made up for ourselves are there to be broken.
It’s normal to have guidelines to live by as long as they are part of happiness, not a cause of anxiety or stress. When we break our own rules, we sometimes find a new side of us that was there all along but we didn’t allow to come to surface.
In a previous post, I highlighted how important it is to do something different and this might be one of the best ways to do it. Break your patterns, invent new rules, let yourself be free from your own judgement.
You are your worst enemy sometimes and your judgement can be harshest than anyone else’s so just let yourself off the hook.
- Breaking the Rules (eviwestmusic.wordpress.com)
- Why I Love Changes (happiness-box.com)
This one comes a bit late because I was away in Brazil having too much fun but I haven’t forgotten my promise so here are the 10 questions for March:
- How could today have been better?
Today’s just one day but it might represent your everyday so your answer can help improve not only today but your life in general.
- If you could add one hour to your day, what would you do with it?
Maybe you can rearrange things and find time to do it anyway.
- In three words, describe your spirituality.
- What new activity have you tried?
It’s very important to try new activities whenever you can. They give meaning to life and make you feel empowered.
- What do you daydream about?
Sometimes this can say a lot about you, what you want and how you are feeling.
- What makes you laugh?
Laughter is the best medicine. It boosts your immune system, boost your energy, diminish pain and protect you against the effects of stress. Therefore, you should do it as often as possible. Read more about it here.
- Who do you aspire to be like?
And what can you do to achieve that?
- When was the last time you felt like you were on top of the world?
Reliving good memories boosts your happiness. Plus this might help you figure out what you can do to go back to that moment or have more moments like that.
- What do you want to remember about today?
Every day has something good about it. Sometimes we forget to appreciate the little things that happen in our everyday life.
- Write down a few lines from a song or poem that you identify with at the moment.